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Oscars 2021: the dresses, the winners, the weird semi-masked ceremony in a train station – live!

Here’s your invitation to the strangest night of the year, when your virtual enjoyment of the 93rd Academy Awards will be, for once, on equal footing with most of Hollywood

Will there be any post-ceremony parties this year? Surprisingly yes. Variety reports that Andra Day is hosting 80 people in a thoroughly Covid-safe soiree. The good news is that guests will be served peach cobbler. The bad news is that nobody will be let in until they’ve taken an on-site rapid test. Well done to Day for finding the only 80 people on Earth who enjoy peach cobbler enough to endure dry-heaving on a testing swab.

NEWS! One person has actually arrived at the Oscars. It’s Paul Raci, who must now suffer through three horrible hours of walking around an unfamiliar train station hoping that he’ll find somebody to talk to, and wondering if he can get away with just hiding in a toilet cubicle until the ceremony starts.

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